Adam Buxton’s Counting Song for Bug TV

OMFG.

Do not play this for your four year old. But do watch it yourself.

Watch this past the 35 second mark and it will make your day, if your sense of humour is anything like mine! I really did lol at this.

Tastefully Offensive on Tumblr, [via]

Link

Apart from the typo (Indian Jones? Really?) and that I wished the creator of this had said Dressed like Magnum PI and Indiana Jones, given the order – that’s just my OCD – I watched Chip n Dale for many years and never – never – spotted this!

Dave Gorman #2

The show was very good indeed. The set was all bright and white, the powerpoint presentation’ish ness was very well done, and scoring a front row, central, seat was just the icing on the cake.

Best joke of the night was not part of the act, but in the advert break.

“Normally,” he said, “the advert breaks in Dave are just there. You cut from Stephen Fry saying, ‘and the reason for’ ” [adverts here] ” ‘book burning is…”.

Then he looked over the audience with the Dave Gorman grin, and carried on.

“We having a proper advert break, with titles and music. We know we’re on Dave. They’ll have to invent another channel to repeat us on!” which caused much merriment.

I went looking for the channel, which is crammed full of repeats, so I could laugh at it, but the very first item on the page was watching Dara O’Briain’s School of Hard Sums, so I gonna watch that instead. Laugh with it.

And I got home in one piece, later than expected, and chatted to Eldest Son who had also just got in from work. Ah, the joys of being kitchen staff!

I have 2 free tickets to see Dave Gorman perform a run-through of his new TV show, Goodish, tonight.

I heart Dave Gorman. This will make the fifth time I have managed to see him, including two stand up shows, one curated comedy show which became one of the stand-up shows, a book reading and Q&A, and a second curated comedy show, where I stupidly sat in the front row and was heckled by the comedians.

So, leave work, go home, change shoes, go see Dave Gorman, get some food, go home. Sounds like a plan to me.

This is the from the first thing I ever say him do:

Reasons to Love Football #21

One match. Two teams. Last day of the season for this division, and the winner of this match will be promoted to The Championship.

O.M.F.G.

Click this link to read a much better report of the match. But do, do, DO watch the most exciting 30 seconds of football seen this season.  And don’t worry – the losers have a second chance to gain promotion via The Play Offs, which is where 2nd to 5th placed teams play against each other for that one remaining place.

Whisky, Whisky and Even More Whisky!

Friday went down to Brighton. Stayed at the Downs Hotel, which is really a pub with Bed and Breakfast facilities, and a restaurant most evenings. Thankfully, it was not as loud as when we last stayed there.

We were down in Brighton for The Whiskey Festival. £20 for a ticket gets one a tasting glass, bottle of water, two free tokens for extra-special tastings, and the opportunity to taste as many whiskies as you can whilst remaining upright.

Balcones were there, and a heap of Islay malts.

Husband got to taste some before we even went in! We were just sitting on the front, taking snaps of the derelict wreck that is the West Pier, when three guys came out waving a bottle and a camera. After failing to take selfies that managed to get them all in, they ask him if he would take some. So he did. Then they asked him “Do you like whiskey?” Does a bear shit in the woods, is the pope catholic? So he got a very large slug of Talisker Storm, a new whiskey Talisker are promoting. Not struck myself, but I like big-bodied, smoky, peaty inyourfuckingface whiskies, and it just wasn’t that.

So, after consuming enough tastes to amount to well over half a bottle, we stumbled back to the bus stop, caught the bus, and went back for an afternoon nap.

Then we woke up, all refreshed if still slightly drunk, and went back to Brighton for dinner. Went to English’s, where I had 6 oysters, fish soup, 6 more oysters (I like oysters a lot!), chocolate and raspberry desert and an Irish coffee, accompanied by a bottle of Pinot Grigio. YUM!

Then found a cocktail bar. I think we only had four… but it might have been five or six, I lost count.

Sunday we just pootled. Went to Eastbourne, had a Victorian Tea Party on the pier, and drove home via Upper Dicker. Good times.

I think I have gained a stone, and killed my liver. But it was fun!

Fuck Fuck Fuckity Fuck

How do you cope with a son with a gambling problem, who has just taken out his second PayDay loan (at the oh so agreeable APR of 4200%!), and who also owes us over £1,500?

Part of me wants to kick him out, part of me wants to lend him money, and part of me just wants to get really, really fucking drunk then beat him to a pulp. OK, not the beating bit, really – apart from anything else, he is bigger than me and would fight back…. Maybe just punching him really hard, once.

This is, of course it would be, Youngest, with his mental health issues, his medication needs and his minimum wage job.

Fuck my life.