Colin Furze and His Fart Machine

Just remember, most British people hold the French in disdain. They came over in 1066, killed our rightful king, Harold, and gave us new words for pig and cow. There’s also the delightful dichotomy of the French Surrender Monkeys and the fabulous and brave French Resistance.

Plus they look down on our cheese.

So, ambivalent much?

Not Colin Furze

He built a machine specifically to Fart at France. Across the English Channel (or la Manche, the sleeve, which is what the French call it) which is where only 22 miles of water separate us from the French. 

And his machine is wonderful!



I’ve just found the ideal vehicle for riding out the zombie apocalypse…



The Terra Wind can be custom designed to fit virtually any decor with floor plans, entertainment systems, elcetronics, cabintry, floor coverings, furniture, paint, and graphics that can be tailored to suit individual needs. 

Price is dependent on the options choosen. The Terra Wind shown is approximately $1.2 million.

Damn, it was looking so good too. But that price is for teak cabinets, marble floor and a whirlpool bath/shower combo. Maybe I could get a cheaper one…

Find your CAMI here! Cool Amphibious Manufacturers International, LLC 

Can’t argue with the name of the company.


First Time a City has Entered the Darwin Award Race

Seriously, Monrovia (capital of Liberia. I had to look it up too.)

Ebola is a scam, so let’s raid the quarantine hospital, kick the patients onto the streets and then steal the blood-stained blankets and sheets?

What the actual fuck?

Only in The Daily Mail…

Came across this article today – sorry, was pointed at this article (I do not want you to think I actually read the Daily Mail!)

Easy life: Jayne admits it’s a bit lazy to keep pushing son Oscar around but it is more convenient for her. And he is a big lad, isn’t he!

buggy 1

And it got me thinking.

Not one of those parents mentioned the only reason for still having a buggy when your child is 3+ and fully capable of walking. SHOPPING. I walked my kids everywhere, which was interesting to do and healthy as well. but still had the pram or the buggy, so that they when got tired (which they do, no matter how fit and used to walking they are!) they could rest, and I had something to hang the picnic / shopping / whatever on.

Judgemental much? There’s even – of course – a tumblr about it.

I really missed the buggy when they were all at school, so I graduated to a ‘granny wagon’ aka a wheeled shopping trolley, and so many people told me that I was ‘too young’ to use one of those! I used to thank them, and still wonder why it is better to carry lots of bags in your hands than push a four-wheeled trolley?

What I really, really hate are those huge buggys that parents use. Size of a small car, capacity for one child. On the bus, unfolded. And then I get told to move my trolley! No way. I can’t fold mine, you can. Deal with it.

Getting a sholley next. Is the next best thing to a walking frame, with capacity. Go for the best, I say!

Memoir Madness

In this week’s writing challenge, mine your memory and write a memoir.


I wasn’t allowed pets. The hedgehog, complete with fleas, was a no-go. No cats – allergies. No dogs – walkies. But to make sure I had the proper amount of childhood trauma, my mother washed my beloved panda then hung him out to dry.

By his ears.

Which detached themselves from his head and stayed on the line, while the rest of Pandy (I was only 6, gimme a break!) fell into the mud. He was stuffed with straw and never, ever recovered.

After that, I never trusted my toys to not suddenly disappear. Or my mother, come to that.

The Edge of the Frame

We often capture strangers in photos we take in public. Open your photo library, and stop at the first picture that features a person you don’t know. Now tell the story of that person.


Ethel and Enid had been pretending to be Ethel and Edward for so long now, it was hard to stop. Even with all this kerfuffle about gay rights, and rainbow pride, they felt happier in their own pretence.


Seven Reasons You Should Thank A Feminist Today

I remember when I couldn’t get a loan without a responsible person – ie, my husband or my father – to be a guarantor. And I’m coming up sixty. Please, dear god, when Daughter is coming up sixty, we will have got further with this!

And High Five to Belle’s grandma!

The Belle Jar

If there is one thing in this world that makes me want to chew my own face off, it’s women who think that feminism has ruined their lives.

You know the ones that I’m talking about – the women who want to live in some kind of souped up 1950s fantasy world where they get married right out of high school and their husband makes enough to support their family on just his income and they think the moral decline of society has something to do with the fact that women no longer wear crinolines and genteel white gloves and cute little hats. Never mind that, you know, lots and lots of families in the 1950s weren’t able to live off of a single income; trust me when I say that feminism did not invent the working mother. Leaving that little scrap of truth aside, I guess I can see what…

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